Friday, April 11, 2008

Lying

Sure, we all lie from time to time. Hell, I lie a lot. What I've been seeing lately is the casual way in which a liar performs. Let's just say, for example, your mailbox gst batted around by a few kids on your street. You see it happen.

They deny it.

You say you saw them.

They deny it.

You go to the parents, and they lie for the kids.

And it's not just wanna be punks tearing up a bunch of shit. Look at our president. Look at Hillary saying she was ducking sniper fire in Kosovo. Abd Barama playing the I Don't Agree With My Pastor nonsense.

Athletes caught with needle in their ass would look sincerely confused and ask if you stuck that in his ass.

People lie at work. They lie to get work. They lie when the fire people.

Here's the skinny sample folks. Lying is for important things like when your girl asks you if she's getting fat. Or, lying at any time to gain control over the TV remote.

Let's not forget the ladies! The either fake a headache or an orgasm. Yes, dear sirs, keep believing her when she says you're the BIGGEST she's ever had. We men might be tempted to declare that everything a woman says is lies. That's not fair. They don't know they're lying. They honestly believe all that crap they whine about.

I made up a bunch of lies to tell in court, like 'I am the early reincarnated James Earl Jones' and 'I'll be right back for my sentencing, your honor'.

So, what have we learned? Never lie for the wrong reasons.

7 comments:

Malach the Merciless said...

Starbuck lied . . . I think, I am going to find out in a few minutes.

Joey Polanski said...

Nex time Im lookin to whack a chicks box, Im hopin she lies still.

FreeOscar said...

"I've lied about all of her orgasms."
~Dr. Mrs. Murk

AngryMan said...

I think you lied about the lesson we learned.

Dr. Robert J. Murk said...

Your all a bunch of stable boy murderers!

DILLIGAF said...

I have only lied when I've fucked some other bird and the wife needed to know I was doing owt but what I was doing.

Justifiable lies.

I'm now working out a lie related to why I can't fuck the wife due to a fungal infection on my dick.

Lying sucks.

Except she can't right now....;-)

Malicious Intent said...

You just took all the fucking fun out of lying! And I bet that was a lie too! How are we to know when you are lying for our own good, for your own good, or just because you forgot what the truth is!

Damn you! I need an ice pack for me head. Maybe. That may be a lie too!