Saturday, July 14, 2007

A Whole New Kind of Hate

Look. I fucking read the book. I read it. It was called Fight Club, and it was by some idiot named Chuck Pallywacker or something. This little fucking nitwit writes a book about guys fighting in basements. It sucks. It SUCKS!

Don't bother reading Fight Club. Take your lazy ass out to some field with a couple of your friends and try it yourself. You're still just a couple of guys hitting each other. It's almost homoerotic in a way... which is fine, if you're into that. I'm not saying it's bad at all. I just wouldn't be gay ever. Maybe for $2,000,000... That would pay for a lot of therapy.

Anyway, back to this whole rant. Give revolution a rest, Gen X, Y and Z. Get a good night's sleep and wait for the professionals to come through with the wrecking ball. Nooooo need to gum up the works and 'blowed stuf upp'. We'll take it from here. We are the Human Race. No one does destruction like us. Get out of our way and let us finish what we started. No reset button. No 'Project Mayhem' or Operation Mind Fuck needed. And here's the kicker...

We'll give you the whole deal for free and you don't have to lift a finger.

If you have no idea what I just said, you are

a). Over Fifty and Acting Like It. Good for you. Fucking live it up until the Sun goes down. I SALUTE you! ALL SINCERITY. Go to town, because here comes the payoff.

b). Under 18 and Showing It. Talk about search hits with that phrase. If you're too young to save the world, don't worry. It's not being saved by anyone.

So, here's my Brand New Shiny Hate...

Strugglers.

No more trudging forward. Lay down. Lay down. Lay down you'll calm the boat. Don't grab at stuff that isn't there anyways. Just lay down. Lay down now.

No more Strugglers.

8 comments:

Dr. Robert J. Murk said...

Fuck you Angryman, you're wrong.

That's a pre-emtive fuck you.

One for Malach too.

Malach the Merciless said...

The struggle is all I have, I make me alive!

AngryMan said...

OK, you're right, I was going to say that Fight Club was good, although not as good as some of Palanhiuk's other novels.
I especially loved Choke, Diary, Invisible Montsters, and Haunted. Haunted was probably my favorite. And don't you think it's a little hypocritical for you to complain about guys trying to start a revolution when you are such an uber-turd?

Dr. Robert J. Murk said...

Actually, I love all his stuff. Seeing as how no one but you and Malach read the comments.

I'm in the middle og Haunted right now. Freaking nasty, hardcore tense. Scary stuff.

Malach,

Just grabbing headlines. Not serious.

AngryMan said...

Murk:
Yeah, Haunted creeped me out. The first story was so fucking disgusting that I almost puked. The one with the kid who aged fast and the Adam and Eve one were really great, and I liked the one about the girl who sniffled all the time. Really, really good. There were a couple others, but I'm having a hard time remembering them all.

Dr. Robert J. Murk said...

Anytime someone puts his/her bare ass on a pool suction unit, you know it's trouble. Especially when the preamble to the story is about painful masturbation mistakes gone horribly wrong.

Cash said...

Your poor taste in authors has made me more willing to destroy you. I didn't believe such a thing was possible.
LONG LIVE THE REVOLUTION!

Christopher said...

Murk

Uraguay